Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Critical Journey: The Recognition of God



“Stage #1: The recognition of God is where we all begin our journey of faith.” (pg 33) It is the place where we see for the first time there is something missing in our lives.

For me, this recognition came when I was young, some time before the age of eight, when my family moved to California. My recognition of God did not come out of a profound adult size crisis. My brother had simply explained to me that without Jesus forgiving my sin I would go to Hell. That was it, that was all I needed to hear! Having grown up in a Christian family, I knew about Hell, though not theologically, but through caricatures and stories. What I knew about Hell was it was not a place I wanted to be FOREVER!

However, it was not until I was nineteen years old and a “sophisticated moron” (a sophomore) in college until I understood what it meant to have a real relationship with Jesus. Yes, I had grown up going to church. Yes, I knew the stories in the Bible. Yes, I had made my profession of faith (several times). Yes, I was baptized a believer. But when I was nineteen, I was hit with I teenage size crisis.

The relationship I had been in with a girl ended spectacularly. The end was traumatic enough to move me further down the path of my spiritual journey (maybe even to begin the journey!). It was the point at which my relationship with God went from being a spoke on the wheel of my life to becoming the central hub to which all other spokes are attached. I tried as best I could to devote myself to being a “good Christian.” I lacked the terms and reference points to know God was shaping me and forming me according to his will. Unfortunately, I did not have a mentor/pastor/teacher in my life in order to help me grasp what God was doing and it was too embarrassing to explain the situation to my parents who may or may not have known how to guide me.

It was in the ashes of this failed relationship, which I thought was the ONE and kept trying to resurrect, that God grabbed and turned my life upside down with a call to be a pastor. In this broken and demoralized state I was to emotionally exhausted to fight with God and too confused to argue with him. I simply conceded and reset the trajectory my life with more careful consideration for God’s leading.

This new direction for my life was not unwelcomed. I had been searching for a meaningful career path, one I at which I could be successful and would enjoy. This new path, however, was a detour no one saw coming.

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