Sunday, May 23, 2010

Experts Say People Don't Like Experts

“They” (the experts who offer wisdom and advice) say people in postmodern culture do not want experts who offer wisdom and advice. They don't want people telling them the way things are or the way things should be. Ironic?! This is particularly true in terms of faith and spirituality. They point out that with the increase in a relativistic point of view; each person believes they are their own best expert on everything.

However, I have found this to be somewhat incorrect. People want pastors and church leaders to help them navigate the complex maze of life and faith. There are times when a voice calling into the fog cautioning them to turn left or right, to stop or start is necessary. They know they are in need of direction, validation and explanation, however not in a vacuum.

Before people are willing to allow others to speak into their lives offering knowledge and guidance there has to be a few prerequisites:

1. Input into another life is not welcome apart from community. No one, likes unsolicited advice or wisdom, not matter how good it is, from a total stranger. It is easy to discount their input by saying or feeling, “who do they think are they? They don’t know me.” A relationship offers a foundation of trust, exposure and a chance to see if the advice giver actually smokes what they sell. Community, developed over time, removes barriers and open channels for the exchange of issues and wisdom.

2. Humility needs to be added to the mix as well. Intellectual humility (“This is my experience, I don’t know everything.”), spiritual humility (“I am on a faith journey too and I have not arrived yet either.”) and relational humility (“You are free to take my advice or not, it’s your choice.”). There is nothing more repulsive than an authoritarian know-it-all.

3. In conjunction with humility, there needs to be vulnerability. People need to see and know those in or with authority are human too, fallible leaders who able to learn from their mistakes. In order for this to happen people need to see into each other’s life and know each other’s weakness. Possessing this information does not undermine the leader authority, but empowers it.

These are just a few of the necessary pieces for those in leadership to cultivate in order to hold a place of valued authority in anothers life. All of these are deposits into the “bank of permission.” By this I mean that when the time comes to make a withdrawal with the authoritative and powerful calls to action, conviction and or accountability, it does not come from out of the blue. Through these prerequisites you have been given permission by those you speak to/with to play your trump card, the “listen to me” card or the prophetic, “God’s Word has said” card.

3 comments:

David said...

It is interesting that the church has made it so we look to one man in a pulpit for expert advice. I just wonder every time I read Ephesian 4, where the apostolic, prophetic, evangelistic, pastoral and teaching trainers really are?

I agree with humility, community and the need for godly advice.

Peace.

Anonymous said...

yeah.,.. indeed all are massaged in their thinking by marketing and a herd mentality... Isn't the real question how is the gospel supposed to be proclaimed in a marketing age?

Vanessa Osei said...

Nice. I see lots of people so quick to throw out the baby w/ the bath water. If someone says one thing they don't like then they stop listening and discount everything they say after that. People must be starving for hope guidance and direction if therapists, life coach's, fortune tellers, Oprah, Depak Chopra, and the like are still in business:)Just tread softly on sin though spiritual leaders,or they may convicted to change lol.